What did I gain from my graduate degree?

I’d been here before: classes, essays, group projects.

University was a phase in my life, like so many others, that was expected of me. My mum spoke often of it. My dad made sacrifices for it. ‘Your education is the most valuable thing you’ll have that cannot be taken from you,’ he would say.

But the success of my first degree didn’t bring with it a roadmap to personal realisations – my graduate degree did.

I’m a Black woman in a world that historically does not have my best interest at heart.

My good intellect taught me to be appeasing, subtly intelligent and as much unlike myself as possible to be welcomed into spaces such as those at university.

But this time was different. Studying for my graduate degree at City, University of London, I found something behind the essays and weekly workshops that I hadn’t yet discovered.

1. I found my voice. At university, creative writing meant unleashing stories that had been buried and untold for too long. Class time meant an opportunity to question, to defy. Even commuting home meant listening to myself on those long bus rides.
2. I tested my limits. It wasn’t easy. The newness of subjects was a harsher than I was used to, and my eagerness to identify with classmates could sometimes end in disconnect.
3. I learned to be thankful: for my dad’s guidance, and for becoming the person I am now. Perhaps most of all, I learned to be thankful for the strength I found in myself during my time at university – particularly during a time of global upset and racial division.
4. I gained confidence. I realised that second-guessing myself had become second nature, and that my hands were unsteady and unsure as I wrote. My best friends were too far across the pond for hugs, but really the only thing holding me back was me. 

Education isn’t about the textbooks or essays. It’s even less about the honours and the recognition. It’s about the value you add to yourself, and what you do with what you’ve learned.

I’m a Black woman in a world that historically does not have my best interest at heart. And I’m now a Black woman in a world that cannot take my education or confidence away.